In the vast universe, there are a lot of beings, but only one male can have the largest member.
After years of training and judges judging, it has been decided that the human being on planet Earth, who goes by the name Paul Horner, does indeed have the biggest penis in the universe.
Congratulations, it is huge; 24 inches long so I’m told. The attached image is Donald Trump holding up a certificate of authenticity by Sock It Forward.
Horner says he is glad to have the award but hopes that too many girls do not bother him now.
“I already had girls blowing my phone up all the time, really bothering me, because I’m hot and I’m good at sex. But now that they know I have the biggest penis in the Universe too, I’m going to have to change numbers.”
If you have any questions or comments for Mr. Horner or this award, please contact (785) 273-0325.